Forlorn in Love, but still committed.
Sometimes I feel like I'm being let down by love! It is something I never have thought possible until just recently and after a decade of waiting and choosing to be single rather than go a direction my heart isn't prepared to go I have held fast to the course that I pledged myself to long ago in hopes that someday Love would prove to be the greater power and preserver by bringing us together. I have had to do this completely in the hope that my beloved would come to this conclusion within herself, because I refuse to be someone that follows, or makes a nuisance of himself by placing myself in her life, I refuse to be a stocker. Slightly pathetic in an unreciprocated love is the most I'm willing to become in the negative stigmas of love-sickness.
In the reality that my love is a potent and life focusing center to all the rest of my
life, I must admit that I have learned a secret to maintaining the strength and stamina necessary to the one-sided giving that this love unfortunately is presenting and proving to be. My secret is once love has been given, once love has been established as being completely selfless towards another, then one must learn to love oneself in the same manner, and also to do so first (prior to giving love away), because if I'm not receiving love from my intended, then I will run myself empty leaving myself drained and without hope in a forlorn state that is destined to become a source of major depression. If I love myself the way I desire to love another, and always desired to be loved by another, then I create within me a self -sustaining supply of Love to be drawn from without fear of depletion as I am not dependent upon reciprocation for the love to continue and the love to be all that I intended it to be.
I once believed the phrase "God is Love" as quoted from the New Testament, and I suppose I still do, but I no longer believe there is a God that will intervine on my behalf to uphold some good name or attribute so that Love will be proven true and vindicated by guiding me and my intended together. I did believe this for a very long time, in my Christian days, but for the obvious reasons and others, I have come to see that it is up to me to become that love that I want to prove is absolute in commitment and provision for the promises I have made in my heart for devotion to and for the woman that I still find purpose and meaning for my life simply by being true to the love that has endured in me for so long, and I give myself to the continued persistence and battle for completion, and hope that I will find eternity not too long to wait for the girl of my dreams.
In Love and Peace,
Zion
Love, Romance & Passion @ www.believepassion.blogger.com posts belong to Zion Marion Amoure creator of IamZion.com ©2013
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